I am a strong believer in using your voice to portray what you believe in so a change can be made. I have been placed in many situations where I discovered my voice and fought for what I believed to be right and fair. I pushed for a change, not only to honour my learning and growing needs but to honour others when they were too afraid to speak up for themselves.
Who are advocates?
- Teachers are advocates for their students
- Students are advocates for their learning
- Doulas are advocates for their clients
- Parents are advocates for their children
- Partners are advocates for their partners
- Family are advocates for other family members
- Children are advocates for change
- Coaches are advocates for their athletes
The list goes on and on, but the most important advocate to identify is YOURSELF. Nobody knows yourself better than you, so you are your own advocate. Self-advocacy means you are able to identify your thoughts and feelings to which you can relay them to others. You have the strength to ask for what you want and need. Ultimately, you are able to speak up for your rights and discover when something doesn't align with your values.
Why is advocacy important during childbirth?
Whether you end up having a home birth, water birth, c-section, medicated birth, non-medicated birth, multiples, breach... the list goes on but, each of those births holds a special story and should never be viewed as superior to one another. This signifies that there is no such thing as a normal birth, the process of giving birth to a baby is normal but the way you give birth is not. By inviting a doula into your birth space, the most intimate and sacred time of your life, you are allowing them to be one of your advocates and they are now part of your team.
Childbirth or really any part of pregnancy and the postpartum period challenges you to be your own advocate. If something doesn't feel right, you call your care provider; if you have questions, you ask a doula or reach out to a friend; if you need support, you find that support! You are never on this journey by yourself, but sometimes it can feel like that. Sometimes it feels like you are in a dark room with no light, you need those connections, those supports to bring you light. By using your voice you can find your light, you can find those rings of support who will show up without being asked because they know you need the help, or who will deliver a meal knowing you haven't eaten in days. Those people are out there but until you speak up and advocate for your needs, they seem invisible.
Saying No & Asking Questions
If you say no to something... you mean no.
Nobody knows you better than you know yourself. During your birth, if something is wrong, speak up; if you don't want a procedure done like an episiotomy, speak up; if your care provider doesn't ask for consent to check you, SPEAK UP! THIS IS ADVOCATION! THIS IS SELF-ADVOCACY!
If your doula sees this happening they will turn to you and say something along the lines of "were you asked to be touched?" or "did you give consent for this procedure?"
That right there is your doula using their voice to get you to advocate for yourself. Your doula is advocating for you.
No matter the situation your doula will be one of your biggest advocates and will help coach you through the process of saying no or asking more questions so you can make an informed decision during this journey. A doula is on your side and they will fight for what is right for you, but remember that nobody knows your body better than yourself.
This blog post was created with the intention of bringing empowerment to your childbirth journey and taking charge of your process. Every birth story is unique, has its highs and lows, but each person going through this experience will accept that and not continue to push it away when they realize that it is their experience and nobody else's.
Being your own advocate applies to so many different scenarios than just childbirth, so I challenge everyone to practice saying no to others, asking more questions and honouring what you believe in. When you speak up for yourself, you are empowering, you are courageous, you are independent, you are passionate, you are a supporter of your own needs, and you are powerful. If you won't advocate for yourself, who will?
-Brielle Pedersen-Skene
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